Jeff from Virginia is what I call the PERFECT LOSER.
Not only has he spent his hard earned money on a phone call so that I can call him IDIOT, LOSER, FAGGOT, etc. and assure him that he will be taken advantage of by me and every other person that he ever comes across for the rest of his life, but here are other facts that surely make Jeff the 'PERFECT LOSER':
* He's 34, never been married.
* Has worn panties to work and on a first date (which of course didn't go anywhere)
* He used to wear his ex-girlfriemds panties when they were dating
* Once he took care of his neighbor's cat whom he had a crush on and stole her panties, put them on, jerked off on them then, got them accidentaly stained and put them back
* He only has had sex with two women and one of them was a one night stand, and the girl was drunk and fat
* He once walked around with a HUGE, STICKY, GROSS cum stain on his pants all the way to the convenience store and back
* He wraps his legs around his neck and shoots his cum into his mouth.. he's done this about 3 times: once he swalled it and the other two times he got it on his face
* He has inserted a hair brush handle and a cucumber in his ass and orgasmed while doing it
* When he was in junior high he fooled around with another guy. He was the one that got him into... well.. being A LOSER. He says that was a pretty "gay summer" and now, well, even though he doesn't admit it openly, we both know deep down he is: A FAGGOT.
* He has never been able to pick a girl up at a bar or anywhere else and he's never used a pick up line on a girl. In fact, he DOESN'T HAVE a pick up line.
If this is not the perfect LOSER LIST what is it? Or can you top it?
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